I have a thing to say!

posted 2024-12-13 4 5

, lunchtime. As of writing this, I have just set up my RSS feed, and styled it appropriately. I am also — by CHOICE — in my school's wellbeing suite, entertaning the younger years with my wit, charm, mind-boggling charisma and expert programming skills. Well, sort of.

For today's blog, I have two new bombshell interests to present to you:

  1. Only Murders In The Building (hereafter known as OMITB)
  2. Agatha All Along

After this break (of a few hours), I will explain how this all came about...

Okay guys, GMT now. I'm back at home, about to explain how these things came to be before I get screentimed probably.

Agatha All Along… ooh…

It's the WandaVision spinoff, basically. This sordid affair all started near the start of term, when I saw a bunch of ads for it at my local train station and decided, “ERMYGERD GOTTA WATCH THIS” without knowing jack about it. (And that's why they call it, "advertising".) So, as soon as I remembered we have Disney+ at home — around October 2024 — I watch the first two episodes. Then, mid-November: I finish the series and come to a resounding conclusion: Agatha Harness is just too SILLY!! I mean,

[spoilers for Agatha All Along & WandaVision] even though she did torture a traumatized Wanda Maximoff, and has committed enough magic femicide to put Matthew Hopkins or whatever to shame,

uhhhh… I dunno. She's just too swag. She seems like she'd kill someone, then pull out the moustache finger tattoo and go,

“Why so peanis??? 😏”

God, I'm so brainrotted. Anyways, the point of the matter is, this is the closest I'll ever get to having a crush on a serial killer. Hopefully.

me when my apartment block has an absurd amount of murder in it

Snarky Latina, her two old twink sidekicks and like 5 murders. This all started when I thought that Ariana Grande was in OMITB. Turns out, Selena Gomez was in it, instead. Heh. Anyways, weird tangent aside, this is probably my series of the year. (Sorry, Agatha, but 9 episodes just doesn't cover my voracious appetite for a show I don't immediately despise.) The characters? Compelling. All but one of the murderers gave me a bloody moral dilemma!!!

(Spoiler alert up to 3.10 — Season 2's one. And even then, I haven't finished Season 4, but whoever 86ed Sazz Pataki probably wasn't nice to begin with.)

But one of these conniving criminals specifically went to my heart. That's right — Theodore "Theo" Dimas Jr. If I had a hear me out cake, he'd have a seat of prominence upon it, 1), 'cause I think I might be “infantilizing deaf people” or summat by doing so, and 2),

Spoilers for 3.7ish. At this point, just watch the series. he's a grave-robber and one-time accidental murderer (sort of). But grave-robbing is — was? — the other family business, and he really liked Zoe and he really, REALLY did not like his involvement in her untimely death.

Plus, he's adorable!!
Okay, I've gotta be real with you guys, it is right now, and if I don't get all of this down by today, I have to finish it on my birthday, which means I can't party the house down and stuff. After that, I'll add pix. But for now, we're sending this blog in a slightly different direction — the one it should've been on first. Selena Gomez and the old guys, doing the pod, and casting it to the wind.

Mabel Mora, amateur detective

Snarky and Medranesque, she is most of the brains of the group. Everything from her childhood, from her “Hardy Boys” friendgroup, to her love for puzzles, seems to have been covered thrice in the stuff you need a shrink to get rid of. She's, uh, cool.

Oliver Putnam, resident drama queen.

Oinky and spectacularly theatrical, Oliver is the annoying one, and don't you forget it! Practically exiled from Broadway after an incident involving Splash! The Musical, his primary Season 1 hobbies are recording everything he can get his little, vaguely Irish mitts on, even if it means invading the privacy of other residents. He's a cutie x

Charles-Haden Savage, aka Brazzos!!!

Bespectacled and milquetoast, Charles is the old one. The really old one. I'm talking a decade older than Oliver! He's the chillest guy ever to gaf. (Yes, gaf. I edit this thing in school, remember?) So much so, in fact, that he often gets nosebleeds talking to other people. Okay, yeah, I admit I was exaggerating his social prowess, but he's still as cool as the others. Cooler, even. He was relevant before the pod.

That's me done for now, then.

Back to the bench?